Me: Hi, Gloria. Do you have time to talk?

Gloria: Oh, I just walked in the office, now there's a bird flying around the office…It's been a horrible day.

Me: Do you want me to call back?

Gloria: Just hold on minute... [15 seconds pass...faintly to someone else] There's a bird in the office...[30 seconds] A bird! In the office! [To me] I can't believe that. Where did he come from?

Me: I don't know.

Gloria: And then he doo doo'd on my desk. I thought somebody had broken in, but who would do that?

Me: It does sound like you're having a rough day.

Gloria: I got your contract, and had a couple questions.

Me: OK, like what?

Gloria: But there's a bird in my office. I don't understand where he's hiding. When I open the window, he hides; when I put the window down, he comes back out. I'm gonna op-- shoot! I just busted my pants! You see what kind of day I'm having?

Me: Are you sure you don't want me to call back?

Gloria: Why won't he come over to this window? I wonder where he came from... Now tell me your terms?

Me: It's 15%. Usually it's 20, but for you I'm lowering it to 15.

Gloria: There he goes again. What are your payment terms?

Me: 15 days...

Gloria: I have to get this bird out of my office. I'm a little scared of birds to tell you the truth.

Me: Really?

Gloria: Well, they carry germs don't they? Lice and stuff? I'll call you back.

........
The next day...

Gloria: I'm sorry it took so long to get back to you. Yesterday, everything was an emergency.

Me: Well, some days are like that.

Gloria: I was about to go bunko with that bird in here.

Me (under my breath): Oy gevalt! Would ya let it go?!?

Gloria: What's that?

Me: Hmmm... nothing...

_________

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